Consume

I was carried away by the drift of an easy Sunday. Like a welcomed visitor that rests in your home, the sun lingers - adding more hours in the day and giving us room to stay in its light a little longer. The pollen sheds as strongly as the storms, the rising of the colorful blooms cast a soft posture in our nature as the breeze and sunlight make an entrance. Spring is here, and it is without a doubt one of my favorite seasons here in East Texas. 

Along with the welcoming of the new spring winds, a new approach to life has been ushered in. A season of intention, of peace, and a clearing of the fog that laid thick in the winter months. Like all understanding, it arrived on time -  like the flowers that stand tall in the fields of March. A discovery that much of our desire for clarity comes with removing the noise that drowns our focus. A true call to begin monitoring the intake influenced me to begin looking at the soil in which I had been nurturing myself this past year. 

We are always in battle with desire and our consumption. We desire to be present, yet we dive headfirst into anxious thoughts about tomorrow. We crave optimism and life-giving conversations but consume ourselves with negative speech. We seek health but take in destructive habits. We desire clarity, yet consume ourselves with mindless scrolling and numbing television. The input becomes our output and indeed, we become what we consume. I’m more gentle of a woman in the spring months. I stop, I notice, I ease any aggression and hurry and turn it into patience, and intention. Something about turning away from the winter months calls me to surrender the empty chasing and doing and allows space for intentional focus. I had been in an unclear haze for a couple of months prior. Driven by impatience, lack of motivation, uncertainty, and confusion about my directions. In a sense, I was drowned out by all the noise. Social media, television, negativity, unhealthy foods, and more, all become my consumption, further distancing myself from leaning into the peace and an over-indulgence in all the noise. It wasn’t long before all that I devoured came out. It came out in attitude, in speech, in fear, in posture, in frustration, in self-doubt, in a false sense of feeling without value, and in performance, 

As January was unfolding, the phrase, “Spring is your landing place” began to press further and further into my intuition. The more I spent my time in surrender, the stronger the idea began to ring with purpose. I desired to enter these months with a more grounding idea of where I’m being led to and the peace that comes with relying on something higher than myself. And I knew I would need to readjust all the consumption around me and monitor what I was bringing in spiritually, emotionally, and physically. 

It’s been one year since all the world went into isolation. 

The grace of spring began to form as we welcomed the beginning days of march. The tulips were rising, my favorite wildflowers upon the roads were blossoming, and the sun was shedding an easy light of comfortability. But  It would all soon be disrupted days later by the impending unknown. The unknown of the pandemic, the unknown of the mandates, and the unknown of who we become in the face of crisis. The pillars of our homes become the foundation in which we created safety, managed our fear, satisfied our boredom, wrestled with injustice, and looked to technology to be our saving grace. Social media usage went through the roof, Netflix became our constant, news infiltrated our psyche, flaring opinions shot like cannons across platforms and I consumed it all like the rest of society. These avenues that once were of creative, informational, and relational value began to be the methods used for devouring chaos and noise. It may not have been true for you, but it was true for me. I knew that if I was desiring clarity for the horizon ahead, I would need to take a look at what I was nourishing my life with.

So I took a social media break. I decided how I would choose to operate in it. I deleted all television services (besides discovery plus because I adore ‘Home Towns’), I unfollowed the negative and hopeless. I grew wide eyes for the people I want to surround myself with. I replaced the background noise with helpful and spiritual podcasts. I cleaned out the fridge and stocked the shelves with green. Monitoring the intake allowed me to create margins of quiet, security, health, optimism, and a sense of affirmation that was being held back by the improper consumption. Cleansing of all that was disrupting the right voice and focus.

A newfound assurance has made its way like the sunlight that peaks through the blinds of my window. I removed the noise, and now the peace has a chance to speak. We blossom at and for the right time only if we’re willing to look at our soil and place the right nutrients in it. Actions and pursuit have a purpose rather than the shallow hustling I participated in. When we get clear, taking steps towards God-given desires feels a little more natural. I’ve let-go of plans and allowed humble guidance towards the right direction - and trust is easier when we aren’t consumed with loud volumes that cloud our discernment. I have more energy as I make decisions that help my body rather than the draining sugars and carbs I was using to numb with. My community has sprouted into a positive atmosphere. 

The seeds we plant with sprout strong and tall - be intentional of what you’re surrounding yourself with, the evidence of your intake will rise.  As the sun sets on the month of March, I continue this season with intentionality, focus, and a listening ear to the soft, but vibrant voice that leads me into the clear spring sky. Monitoring what goes in, creating a sharper mind, trust in the process, purposeful action, and finally...peace. 

We become what we consume….